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Monday, June 18, 2007

posted on: 12:11 AM

I happened to read this on The Straits Times, Life today 16th June 2007. As I notice the 2 ladies featured were Celeste and Nicole, I can recognized their one of those that I have added them as friends in Friendster.

The head line, “Not Deep Lasting Friendships” - The Straits Times, Life! Mailbag. This is how it goes.

I refer to Michelle Tay and Joyce Hooi’s stories(16,000 ‘Friends’ And Counting, LifeStyle, June 10) on online friendships. I have a Friendster account. But I’m not someone unbelievably “popular” with thousands of online “friends”. I have 215 friends. I’m proud to say (or at least happy) that I know about 200 of them. They are schoolmates or people I’ve met at events. Basically, I have met and talked to everyone of them. There are also the few friends of friends of friends who have added my name to their network. Are all online friends true friends? The answer is no. In the case of Nicole and Celeste Chen (mentioned in the LifeStyle story as having 16,000 friends), I am disgusted at how they feel that expanding their network base via 11 Friendster accounts actually leads to an increase in popularity. It was stated that people probably added them as friends because of their skimpy attire in photos and personal dance videos. So are they, or their bodies, becoming more popular? Do Nicole and Celeste Chen know all their 16,000 online friends? Have they met and talked to them? Do they like, know and trust them? Or do they just receive comments in their personal sites and profile page about how great their bodies look or how cute their faces are?
This is the case of many users of Friendster and other online networking sites. They dream of having thousands of friends so that:

> Their true friends would feel privileged knowing that they are friends with someone with so many online pals, or
> They feel accepted when they are told how “hot” they look online.
This result in teens “camwhoring” (a term for taking lots of pictures of their faces alone) in their homes, restaurants, malls and even public toilets just to snap a few “cute” shots to upload onto their Friendster accounts. I’m not saying that making online friends is a crime or that the latter can never turn into true friends. Why, people have even become couples because of their online profiles. At the end of the day, the question is: How do you determine whether a person is a true friend?

- Sandra Tan

I FIND it rather amusing, and shallow, to think that you are more awesome or likeable if you have more online friends. Since when do people become friends by just submitting names to someone’s Friendster account? Tell me, if something bad happens to your family, how many of your online friends are going to comfort, or help you or even care? By the way, I am not old. I am 11.

- Samantha Wong

“Thanksful for Friendster”

THROUGH Friendster, I met my boyfriend. I was featured in The Straits Times for a Stomp makeover a few months back and one guy did a search on me through Friendster. He e-mailed me almost everyday. He asked me out for coffee so I decided to meet him. It has been a few weeks of romance since. I am very glad that Friendster exists. You can see what type of friends the person has and use that to gauge his or her character. All the information is available - which schools the person attended, hobbies and a short biography. I envy those who have 1,000 friends (I have 50) because I believe “the more the merrier”. It’s nice to know that so many people like your profile and want to be your friend. I also managed to track down some school pals from CHIJ Secondary Toa Payoh. It has been more 12 years since we saw each other.

- Clarissa Wong

What’s wrong with the idea of making friends from MIRC(Internet Relay Chat), MSN(Messenger), Forums and Friendster?

- Rating: ***** (max)

MIRC - played: when I was 13 - 17 years old.
Nicks used before: VaMpKA, ImpureLuv, DjWatSiah. (Do you know me?)

Perhaps why people don’t feel good with IRC was because they had an idea of any guys who played IRC are desperate. Of cause it true there were people who played IRC mainly to know girls for sex, looking for a relationship. But there are people who truly visit chat-rooms like IRC for friendship. I don denied I had tried to find a girlfriend in IRC when I was 13-14 year old. And yes, I did manage to find a girlfriend of cause it does not stay for long. =) Then when I was 17 years old, young teenager like me start to get even more curious about sex. Some of them I know I admit I did have sex with them before, of course we were both above the legal age for sex. Remember that time I am already 18. Ok to be simple, my ‘first time’ only came when I was 18. Besides that, we cannot forget true friendship exist. Angela was one of the girls I chat with when I log into IRC at the age of 14, she was 13 in 1996. Still remember she also the first IRC friend I had met, the first meet up was organized at Heeren HMV fountain. We both each came in a group of friends in 5, up till present date, Angela and me are very close like brothers. People who only go into IRC and chat on ‘Private Windows’ are weirdo, the rest of the regular IRC players like us chat mostly in the channel main screen with groups of people on the same time, you need some skill to manage that. Never really touch IRC for years already. The other IRC clan that are still in contact were: Esther, Daphne, Claris, Rachel, Joanne, Patrick, Jolene, Jamie, Jane, Vichelle, Sugarette, Silver, SiSi, Rykiel, Von, Feicelia, Candice, Sarah, Andrea, Prada, Andy, Marcus, Melvin ..etc

Rating: **

MSN - played: cant remember.
Nicks: Random changed (not fixed).

People would prefer using MSN to chat, mainly because they can choose who to add and who to be remove from the friend’s list. But to me is different, as long we are friends who met before or not, I believe they can be found in my list. MSN gives people a more personal idea. Therefore normally anyone can easily delete/block off those perverts found in their list. Personal view it pretty safe to chat on MSN as long you know who you are talking to or and add the users carefully. It kind of important to user like me, I love to make friends all around the island through online. It great as we can get their email address and add them in MSN to chat with them later on, after their approval. Isn’t it fast? Better than the idea of sending email or leaving messages in their message box, sometimes it take days to get reply. One of the best of course is the video call functions. I don really touch on that until Lynn appear. When we first on MSN, she video call me but at that time I still not yet had my own webcam. Some others video call kakis were Madeleine my little rabbit, Stephanie the cool girl & tattoo fanatic, Crystal and Bettina my little bitch haha. How great it can be when you had friends who are overseas. But till now, yes there are a lot of friend in my list whom I had yet to met them before, but I enjoy talking to them as they are people who I can talk to when I need one. Instead I cant even manage to open up to my own friends, except for a few. MSN Rocks! Add me okie! Desmondtsy@hotmail.com

Rating: ****

Forums - played: 2002 - 2005.
Where?: Chillicrap.com & Ohgenki.com
Nicks: mIracIe for CC / miraclezoukie for Ogk.

I cant remember how I got to know about Chillicrap. It was during my national services, I’m pretty addicted to forums because people who visited there are much different from others who were from IRC. We get to post our views/comments/ideas to others or our own thread. Thread is a section user create with a topic for people to comments and discuss about it. You can create as many thread as you like, of course if it successful then people will start to notice you and start to follow your thread. Making friends never stop anywhere as long there are people. There’s section for us to create our personal thread who holds all our photos, people then will start to talk about you and start making friends. We also organize outings almost every week by different organizer. Through Chillicrap also a place how I met Lydia my ex-girlfriend for 2 years. I had make lots of fun-loving people during the period of time. Every Sunday we will hangout at Sentosa Siloso beach, Sunsetbay. Soon some others introduce me to another forum Ohgenki, cause Chillicrap I guess they are too strict over certain regulations. Anyway I had not visit to forums anymore.

Rating:***

Friendster - played since 10/2003
Nicks: Desmond Jerkie & Desmond Lovie, I had 2 accounts.
Can be found at: Desmondtsy@hotmail.com / Miraclz@singnet.com

I think almost we all had heard about Friendster. I think till now this is the best website for people to manage or remain contact with their current friends or to make new friends world wide. From simple profile layout to now you can simply customize with other sites to assist you or unless you had knowledge with html, no harm doing on your own. First Friendster had a limited of only 500 friends. At that time I though of having more than 1 account. But I believe if I had, which account should I focus on? When my first account hit the amended max. of 1000 friends, I notice it pretty tough for me to actually keep track or find a friend in my account. Therefore I decided to create my second account mainly just for my friends only. Great things to received testimonials or comments, cause they are words your friends wanna tell you deep in their heart. And it show all the common friends between you and each of your friends. True that my social circle enlarge a lot with Friendster. But I don denied 95% of my friends in Friendster were girls. There’s nothing wrong as I click much better than girls, being that way doesn’t mean I’m a guy who just go for girls. Stop that jealousy comments for yourself. I treat them as friends and same goes to them, of course I do like some of them before as days goes by haha secrets!

Rating: ****

Just be careful when you are online and you shall be safe. Just don try anything funny and stay out of trouble. Don let strangers know too much about you, such as IC number, bank related details etc. For younger girls of course try not to provide too much personal particular bah. But sharing with others where you stay is nothing much I guess, as long don tell them where exactly will do. As for myself, I am not afraid of letting them know where I stay but not my units, I don mind if they want my mobile number, MSN etc. Maybe perhaps I’m guy that’s way. Whatever I said it my own thinking, just keep to your own ways. If you take any advise here, mainly at your own risks. Thanks!

Dessy Desmond Tan.
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